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About Houston

Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

Zachary A. Wilde

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Down by the park, there’s Seneca Groves, a green hug in the middle of the maddening hustle. That park! Leafs rustlin’ like whispers, cool breezes remindin' me of when I first opened the spa. I once, err, accidentally locked myself in a jacuzzi there. "We need to go deeper," I muttered, hoppin' mad, but then I laughed – stupid, fat hobbit moments, I tell ya.

Plans to redevelop former Seneca Mall site